Marriage Roadwork

As per my recent post regarding my sweet Wendi and my 53rd anniversary, I wanted to expand and confess some things perhaps encouraging and helpful to anyone reading my posts.

First off- I have often heard and been told how encouraging it is when people notice us in terms of our marriage, love, sharing in service to Jesus and others. Why? I think by God's grace it demonstrates possibility and stability in a long-term relationship. For many years now in most human society there is increasing self-centeredship, instability, for many a continual pulling apart, dividing along with unforgiveness, lack of reconciliation and in a word, doubt. I mean serious lack of faith that partnerships of authentic love and intimacy can even happen.

I mean, sure, lots of people keep trying because utter loneliness births despair and a sense of rootlessness that we all experience as a sense of being lost, unfulfilled and thus a life lacking in value.

Wendi's life was laced with all the baggage coming from an abusive grandfather (preacher!) and who in these days would be recognized as a bi-polar, addicted and abusive father (also a preacher). Her bouts with boys and men were rarely more than her being used and neglected in the end. The one -major- saving grace was her godly, loving mother.

My upbringing was a family in emotional turmoil, everyone for themselves daily life, spiritually without any real connection to God or even any sort of church, marked with illness and resulting poverty and finally divorce after divorce in terms of my parents, then brother, sister and you get the picture. I became an addict.

Both of us came to Jesus in desperation, high drama and His powerful intervention and neither of us saw it coming. His love was literally right on time for each of us. We met at Jesus People of Milwaukee, both 18 year olds and married in the ministry there at 19.

As young, fresh followers of Jesus neither of us knew what we were doing a whole lot of the time! The first 3 to perhaps 5 years we needed a lot of prayer, godly input and patience from solid mentors, experiences with the Lord and the close-knit community of missionaries in Milwaukee, on the road all through the South, Midwest and eventually Chicago.

We will both tell anyone how important it was to see genuinely stable, fruit-of-the-Spirit followers of Jesus up close and personal who were willing to talk with us, both listening and giving biblical, godly advice. We, of course, took it or did not but over those early years, constant travel sharing the Gospel and interacting with all sorts of professing believers and churches as well as street people as we did through these parts of the U.S., it was clear there were solid marriages and hanging-by-a-thread relationships everywhere -as well as crash-and-burn people.

Both of us learned that love involves real, deep and ongoing repentance, forgiveness, surrender to the risen Jesus, confession of sin, human-to-human, couple-to-couple accountability and humility willing to ask for and receive help -or else!

Children both "natural born", adopted and foster proved quite the challenge and wake-up call for us. We made plenty mistakes with each of them as we did in our marriage, yet as I look back I see God's hand, grace and forgiveness through all the relationships both as a couple and as parents. Without His presence in our lives then and now it would have been far, far worse!

At the same time our love for each other grew and grew -as did the patience, kindness and joy -truly "God is at work in you to work and will for His good pleasure" became ever clearer.

Sacrifices? Blunders? Suffering? Who on earth doesn't experience all these alongside the pleasures, reassurance and graces Jesus brings to all who are serious about following HIM?

It was and is due to our individual and shared commitment to seeking and following the Lord we stand as I write today these 53 years down the track.

Roadwork indeed. It starts at the beginning of the journey and ends in glory with our Savior in His way, His timing, His kingdom we are so very blessed to be part of!

I don't toss many "christianeze phrases" around much, but whenever I say "Glory to GOD!" I'm not joking or speaking glibly... it is truly the grace, glory, strength of the Lord in our marriage that has given us possibility of change and healing as well as actual fruitfulness to the extent of experiencing true love -and that beyond mere human love- into our life together.

ALLELUIA!

I'm well aware we're just one of millions of couples on this road, but I can say for certain it's more than a matter of survival. It's about flourishing in God and one another if and as trust in Him, His Word, surrender and loving obedience to Him is one's chosen path. I'm not talking about sinless perfection because nobody lives that but Jesus Himself. I'm talking about God's amazing grace blessing and enabling people to be a blessing to Him -and others. I suggest to you it's more art than science but it IS possible!

As always, thanks for stopping by. -Glenn